My Farm Life

Here I am to take my plunge into blog world!  It’s been a thing to do for a long time, with major prompting from Amy who believed that blogging was the answer to revive/maintain/promote/save my stamping life.  But I couldn’t keep up with her amazing creativity, and if I couldn’t totally beat her at the game, I wasn’t even going to get into the arena!   That would be a total time-buster, because I’d have to stamp AND blog, and twenty four hours are just not enough.  But then Louise started blogging, and she showed me that you don’t have to have a totally stamping blog .  I could add stamping just as the voices in my head tell me to.   So I started looking around, and found Madge and Thursday Drive, and I knew that I just had to blog.  I could so totally do this (not as well as they do, but I could do it).  I had twenty gazillion things I could blog about RIGHT NOW.  Then the OCD kicked in.  First I had to have a blog name.  Oh, the agony of that.  I had trouble naming my children, now I was going to re-open that wound for a blog?  Here are is what the voices were saying (if I’m going to blog, I must use good  correct  grammar):

Who knows how people will twist the name to make it say something it’s not?  What will people think of me if I name it this or that?  I like the name “midnight blogger” but I would have to commit to an hour of insomnia every night, and I just don’t have that kind of follow-through (besides the minor detail that it’s already taken!)  What happens if I start blogging and then just can’t keep it up – will that be another sign of total failure?  What if people read my blog?  What if they don’t?  Will they read or avoid it just based on the name?

Surely I’m not the only blog-virgin who’s gone through this process?!  And all the time, my blog-fodder file (in my head) is growing and growing to the point where I figure I could write a whole bloody book if I’d just sit down and do it already!  But first I have to find a theme.  And the theme has to match the name (what the heck am I going to name this thing anyway?)  I finally came up with a name that made people around me giggle (or was it a snicker?  Oooh?).   Then the web woman said the theme I picked wasn’t widget-ready (what the heck is a widget anyway?) So I had to come up with another one (a theme?  No a name.  Or both?)  that fit who I am and matched my name.  Oh – the pressure.  In the mean time I started reading more blogs by clicking through other people’s blogs, and I stumbled upon Suzanne and Rechelle, and together they describe me totally (except not completely – just my life. . . I’m living my country doctor’s wife’s life nine miles from everywhere) and I was filled with doubt.  If they’re already writing about me, and doing a much better job than I could ever do (and they don’t even KNOW me), what did I think I could contribute to the blogosphere?  I’m not a writer, never have been a writer, don’t even want to be a writer.   By this time the web woman had my domain up and the theme in place, and it was out there with the standard <blah blah blah> on the page for everyone to read and I just cringed.  I CAN’T DO THIS!!!  I talked myself off the ledge and went to bed just knowing that everything I have to do this week will totally eliminate any prospect of blogging, not to mention the next week, when I’m going to be out of town, and the next week when we have to get everything finalized for school, and the next . . . no – I’m canceling the whole thing.  I’m an idiot to have even considered blogging.  What the heck would I blog about anyway?  I have NO life, nine miles from anywhere.

So. . . here I am.  Midnight (well, okay 3 am).  I typed most of this entire blog entry into the “edit here” place.  In the process of inserting the links, I clicked off my edit and lost the whole thing.  So I started again in Word – I can cut and paste later.  I CAN do this.  I WILL do it.  Not perfectly.  Not as creatively.  Not as funny.  Just me.  When I can.  And I’ll make lists.  And take pictures.  And share my life.  Thanks for joining me!  (Now how the heck do I get this saved and out there?  Shall I call Amy now, or in three hours?)

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